Hey Everyone!! 😊
I posted this on Facebook a while ago and thought I'd share it here too. Why not, right? Hopefully, it will give you a laugh. 😉
Am I the only one who wakes up to a queue every morning?
"Yes, I'm still breathing. No, thank you, I don't need you to stick your tail in my mouth to make sure."
"Yes, I still love you. You, too. Yes, and you. No, I don't need you to try to kill each other on top of my head; I'm perfectly capable of being the human for all of you at the same time. Yes, I'm 100% sure, but thank you for your concern."
"Yes, I will get up and feed you eventually, even though I'm positive you still have food in your bowl. No, I haven't forgotten. Nope, still haven't forgotten. Yes, I'm getting up. May I open my eyes first please?"
"Yes, I still love you. I know it has been five minutes since you last stuck your butt in my face, but I promise I haven't forgotten you. Or you. Or you, either."
"Alright I'm up. I'm up for fuck's sake! Yes, I still love you all. No, I will not bend over to pet you, right now, because if I do there's a good chance I'll end up on the floor."
"If you trip me, and I break something, I won't be able to feed you. In fact, if you guys make me fall, I'm staying on the floor and going back to sleep."
"No, there are no extra points for making the most passes at tripping the human. Nor are there extra points for tripping the human on the stairs. Yes, I'm sure."
"No, if you bat the can out of my hands, I will not be able to open it faster. Nope, doing it a second time won't speed up the process, either."
"Okay, if y'all want to play keep-away-hockey with that can, that's fine. I'll leave the can opener here on the floor, and you can open it when you're ready."
"What do you mean 'meow'? No, turning it into a moan with a convincing death-rattle at the end doesn't make it any clearer. I'm not chasing the can around. If you want me to open it, stop playing keep-away with it."
"Yes, I know. I'm completely unreasonable. Somehow, I think you'll live. See? Now you even have canned food to help you on your recovery."
"You know, if you trample me to death to get to this can, I won't be able open another one tonight."
"Yeah, yeah, you're cute when you purr at your food. You're welcome."
Sheesh! 🙄
#FurryBrigade #MorningRoutines
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